A few nights ago I was sitting in front of the computer wasting time while my kids and my husband were quietly sleeping. As I sat there I had the thought that I was wasting my life.
I love my family and I realize how important they are to me, I honestly don't know what I would do if I didn't have them, but I don't act grateful.
I am also grateful to be a woman, but I don't act like it.
Instead of focusing on the important things in life I focus on things that aren't important. Maybe it's some emotional problem, I don't really know. I do know that I don't like who I am becoming and I don't like where my life is going.
So I hatched a plan. Really it was a thought, a small seed, but this thought struck very powerfully. I grabbed a pen and jotted down some notes so I wouldn't forget and went to bed.
For the last week or so I have been working a plan over in my head and jotting some notes. I named my plan: Project Princess-Mommy.
OBJECTIVE: To become a better mother and a better woman
I still haven't worked out all of the details but here are the basics of my 3-month project.
PROJECT DATE: June 1,2010-September 1, 2010
PROJECT DESCRIPTION: I will achieve a state of fulfillment by focusing my energy on becoming a better wife and mother and a better woman. I will do this by making smaller goals, but by no means easy goals. My hope is that this project will be fun and eye-opening.
WIFE AND MOTHER:
I love to read and play games. But I spend far too much time dinking around on the Internet or getting lost in a book.
My plan is an intensive three-month schedule. I am hoping that by putting myself on a schedule and sticking to it, most of the time at least, I will be able to change my habits.
I want my girls to spend more time learning and playing. I will make this easier by planning time for teaching in my schedule.
The basic gist of the Wife and Mother portion of the project is reprogramming me into a mini- June Cleaver. I know it sounds extreme but I also know my personality. I need a drastic change. I am going to focus on my family and I'm going to do it in style.
WOMAN: I love being a woman. I love feeling girly but I don't take very good care of myself. This part of my plan is going to be fun fun fun, mostly. I am overweight because I don't eat well and I don't exercise. So the simple solution: Schedule in exercise and plan my meals. This will help with the mommy part of the project too (hot meals are easier to prepare when you have a plan).
This next week my husband and I are going to revamp our diet. We want to try to eat as natural as possible for a month. While I won't completely cut out processed food we are going to focus on fresh fruits and vegetables, fish, chicken and whole grains. Say goodbye Dr. Pepper (diet too!) and ho-hos.
To motivate myself to exercise I am going to train for a 10k. It's going to take 6 months probably before I can even hope to do most of a 10k, but I really want to do this.
The fun part of this woman plan is makeup and pampering. I have never been high-maintenance or frilly or particularly active in pampering myself. In the past I have never felt close to the women who can really do their makeup.
I am going to practice and adopt a rich-woman attitude. I won't be going bankrupt doing this project but I want to see how it feels to REALLY take care of my body. I want to feel like one of those women who are completely pulled together, classy and orderly.
By no means to I expect this to be easy. I am looking forward to the challenge. I also realize that we all have problems and just because I try to change my life doesn't mean I won't have set backs and other issues. I know I will, but I hope by really changing myself I will find an inner peace and I will be able to have a stronger relationship with my family and God.
I will continue to update this blog over the next several months. I will have weekly goals and more long term goals. Keep coming back to see how I am doing. Feel free to comment and tell me about your experiences!!