Wednesday, July 28, 2010

No S Sherlock

Some time back I tried this diet called the No S diet. Basically: No Seconds, No Snacks, No Sweets except on S days (Saturday, Sunday and special days.) It's not that hard and I don't know why I stopped doing it. I think I started cheating and after that it was small steps to abandoning it entirely.
I have decided however that this is going to be the simplist way for me to start eating healthy. I'm adjusting it and only doing no seconds and no sweets. I feel like not allowing myself to at least snack on fruits and veggies is going to be overkill for me. So here's to redos and THANK HEAVENS we have redos.
Life has been a bit stressful and my idea behind this blog and motivation has waned a bit. In the last few days I have been aching to get back on track. I truly believe that if somebody really really wants something they'll get it somehow.
It goes without saying that I really really want to be healthy and skinny. Yes my faithful readers I want to be skinny. I realize it seems vain compared to just wanting to be healthy, but in some skewed part of my mind I think I'll be happy if I'm skinny.
What am I going to do if when I get to skinny I'm still not happy? Probably get rich. If beauty can't make me happy, surely money can... right?
I really do want to lose weight and be healthy. I would like to have another child, but I refuse to get pregnant again while I'm so worried that I'll have more complications and being overweight makes those complications all the more likely.
I need a change and I know that taking back my body will allow me to change for the better.

Thursday, July 8, 2010

Hodge Podge

Today has been a good day. I feel like I have actually accomplished a few things. I made a list and pretty much finished it, I still have several hours left in the day so my odds of completing my tasks are pretty good.

One thing I did was organize a beauty binder. I get Self magazine and a few others. I like many of the articles so I have kept the magazines stacked around. I decided to tear out articles and such from ideas from cooking to working out to beauty and skin care. I'm looking forward to adding more articles and tips.

The topic I really want to work on is getting my insides to quiet down. I feel so stressed and anxious and angry all the time. I hate it. I need to figure out a way to step out and calm down so I stop losing my temper with the girls all the time. I know scripture study and prayer will help a lot if I could just get my rear in gear. I am interested in learning about some other types of meditation as well if any one knows any that would be interesting to study let me know. Maybe it's just me but I swear there are days that I hate being a stay-at-home mom. Does that make me a terrible person? To be fair most days of the week I have an extra child I care for and he's a handfull. I hate admiting it out loud because I feel like people will think I am horrible. But, I love my kids and I love seeing things that I know I would miss if I wasn't home. I guess, I don't always feel fulfilled as a mom and I am hoping this project will help me explore activites I can do that will help.

Many people don't know I have taken about 6 years of Spanish. 1 in jr high 2 in highschool and four college courses. I still can't speak it. I can read some and remember a fair amount. I gave up though because the grammar was so stinking hard. I don't want that learning to go to waste so I have decided to work on flash cards. I will start with one tense and a few vocab words a week. I remember a decent amount so studying on my own for a while should suffice. I am really excited about doing this and hopefully my espanol will be muy bueno soon.